I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
Ok well I'll be up all night studying if you need a wake up call or a place to put your penis.
Listen to my proposal.... I feed you crackers while I fuck you ever so gently.
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I apparently lifted the young child over my head yelling "Victory!" after that last game of pool, right before doing some Girls Just Wanna Have Fun karaoke.
My last Google search was 'can an impotent man have sex'. I don't even want to know what I did with that guy.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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