doing a bong hit while wearing crest white strips...not such a great idea...
so he just called his new girlfriend by my name and she was too drunk to even notice how awkward..
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
He woke up in a dragon costume, covered in bong water. That was a party we will regret missing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
Trying to do the walk of shame over here WHY are there a hundred ppl on the el?! Thank god I pulled a summit and wore casual clothes I even stopped by the farmers market and bought some squash
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize