his balls ACTUALLY tasted like nuts
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
A surplus of mistakes were made and I don't know what 89% of them were.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
Is it weird that I only look up my ex on Twitter when I take a shit? May have conditioned myself to associate him with shit
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
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