You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Vaginas are confusing as hell with all their secret compartments and shit.
I'll get my vaginal cartography poster.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wat the fuck dude ketchup in my bong???
you tried turning the bar into a spelling b competition last night and every time someone couldn't spell something you would make them chug.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember when there was a happier time when people could all hang out together with out the awkwardness of the fact that she stole $1000 and cheated on a brother with another brother !?!??
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
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