And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
I feel like Captain Blackout doesn't do her justice. Brigadier General Blackout is much better.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
I wore granny panties last night to ensure I didn't sleep with him. He said they made me seem more mature. I need a new plan
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I just won 200$ from Bar Karaoke, for singing the "Sailor Moon" theme song, and then the Pokemon theme song, also known as the motherfucking ANTHEM OF POKEMON MASTERS LIKE ME. I HAD TO REPRESENT.
Don't act like you're a victim to marijuana
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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