he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
Girl just texted me a pic of her boobs with the caption "don't think I'm a whore"
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
I might have been fine if i had magic teleportation powers and could have skipped the car ride between bar and home
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
I'll text you later. I think she thinks we're taking this whole "no sex" thing seriously.
Just busted the chick who slept with my boyfriend with alcohol. God I love being an RA.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Like what? And no, shrooms cannot be party favors.
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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