she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't go on dates. I watch tv and play with dicks. dinner is a situation.
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't included my nuts in a shave since the Shaq/kobe Lakers era. I gave my self the ol full court press in order to change the tempo.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
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