thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
I guess since this is supposed to be my year of the lesbian it's okay
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
Please. I don't care how shitty his fake life story was. As horny as I was I just wanted the prettiest man possible in case I accidentally got pregnant. He had blue eyes.
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
Is there any chance of you maybe wanting a bouncy house at your wedding. Like maybe a .0001 chance. If so I would totally chip in for that.
Randomize
