Let's get naked and see who's stronger.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Did I really just send a work email with cum instead of come? feck me
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
You had me at "let me see your balls"
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Randomize
