HE had a tribal tattoo tramp stamp, jasmine.
I just watched a girl use a tall boy Coors as a rolling pin to make christmas cookies
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I am willing to take shots of vanilla extract. That's how this night has been.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
Listen, don't freak out when you walk out on me masturbating in front of my roommate. No homo. He just needs to be put to his place.
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
So we just smoked a bowl, out of an antler, with this old dude, while standing at the bar. Dude just walked up and said we were in his spot, just began packing it and handing it around...
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
Also Fuck you Stephen King and Fuck the horse you rode in on, making me cry In front of my coworkers.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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