cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
When she can manipulate the direction of her leg hair, you know its time to leave
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after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
if I want to go home with a foreign boy, please feel free to let me go, sober me gives you permission to let drunken me do it
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
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just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Once you share a nude experience with someone and three Norwegian guys, you're bound for life.
Dude mama brought home the bacon, i got his HBO account i guess that makes up for his by par skills in bed.