This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
i realized boys travel in groups of 3's and girls travel in 4's..thats why it gets so tricky
like hot dogs and buns.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
I just added Tubthumping to the playlist for tonight. This is going to make or break the party.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Last night when we were having sex he put the condom on backwards the first time. While he was putting the second one on I blew up the first one, made it into a balloon and hit him in the head with it. I think we're over the honeymoon stage.
Randomize
