oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
hey soul. what's that? you, dignity and pride are left for the night? coulda told me that before i vomited all over my mother.
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
He wanted me to blow him while he was playing guitar hero. there will not be a second date
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Dude, I just scraped frozen vomit from my rooftop
I really wish I could say this is a new low for you
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
They fucked on my pong table last St. Patty's and broke it. I feel like I should be hiding my new one. Would hate for a tradition to form.
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
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