You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
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It was unlikely that the relationship was going to end with anything other than antibiotics.
started her walk of shame as my mom and dad walked through my common room door...my dad held the door for her and told her to have a nice day
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
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You're cordially invited to the love nest for alcoholic and aquatic adventures. Also known as an all expense paid trip to my pool, alcohol, and vagina.
He said i looked like a shooting star sprawled out on the floor while i puked and i kept blaming "senor cuervo" for doing me dirty.
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
Come get me...at gazebo by side entrance....im passed out in a bush...this is a Bar A bouncer texting for your buddy
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
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