Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
You wouldn't let me clean the puke off your face because I'd mess up your cat whiskers. Now that's dedication.
I am trying to think of a way to make alcohol cupcakes
Come, dress lightly, bring tequila...
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
Idk. Im in a bed. the walls are wood. There's a deer mount.. im afraid to turn over and see who's next to me but he's violently cuddly.
I would rather deep fry my own cock while it's still attached to me than have his life.
Can't. Busy recovering from the worst pulled muscle of my life that I got either from excessively acrobatic boning or carrying a huge fucking ice luge down the street while wearing 4 inch heels
I had a meltdown and you quoted Puddle of Mudd to me
my liver is dry heaving
I'm mainly pissed because I shaved fucking EVERYTHING for this. WITH SHAVING CREAM. Men do not appreciate how rarely that happens.
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
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