Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
we walked around the neighborhood with caution tape tied around our foreheads, making indian noises. I might have disturbed a crime scene to make a native american headdress.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
Honestly bro, I can't look at girls you've banged. Its like looking herpes in the face.
her vagina just converted me to Judaism.
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Sorry about kicking you last night but you don’t mess with a girls margarita bucket. Ever
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