the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Just heard an advertisement for 40 proof chocolate milk. We may never have to grow up
i chugged some hot sauce before i gave him head. i think a burning penis is a great way to say fuck you
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Where the royal fuck are you??
The depths of vodka hell.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I woke up with chocolate melted between my tits. I'd say that's a win for all parties involved.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
dude me and this dog are gonna go bond oon the tramplene with stromboli... i think everyone is staring at me... being this high is SO stressful
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