laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
i think i'd rather have a trophy of a like jizz stained curtain or something
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
he is allergic to cats. we can only glue dog hair on him. otherwise he might die and i dont want to be responsible for that.
ahaha ok
let's call it "werewolfing"
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
So i think i'm going to frame my summons tickets and give them to dad as a christmas present...
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
All I know is that I woke up with my pajamas on inside out in front of a bowl of watered down kd. Sitting up. I didn't even make it to bed.
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
