what happened last night??
everyone saw ******'s vagina
and that's just the beginning
I took my penis out way before I got to the bathroom and some dude kicked me out.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
It wasn't the stripper that gave you the hickey but I just figured out who did
It's like that thing with the devil and the angel except one shoulder has orgasms and the other has stuffed crust pizza and depression.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
only i would get off to receiving death threats online
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
