Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
whoooo knowwsss what george of the jungle juice is but i feel like im in the promised land
I gave up. I'm crying over my notes. Oh, ya know, just another drunk finals week
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
The upside of a losing football weekend is that there are more sad frat boys willing to let loose their inner gay man.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
In Punta Cana for my bachelor trip, hopefully tomorrow my passport is blacklisted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what the hell makes you think you get to decide what your going to wear at our weding!?
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
How you doing tonight? I got my butthole licked so i cant complain.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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