i may or may not be hanging out with a boxer who has a daughter tonight. and he just spelled "honestly" like "onistly". He has prob taken a few too many hits to the head but he's hot at least.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
we were having sex and the sweat made her make up run... seriously laid there and watched her face just melt into ugly.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Iranian Rapper, camaroonian basketball player, mexican i forget and indian doctor....this one looks the best on paper.
I just finished deleting miscellaneous contacts from my phone ... time for a HIV test!
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were naked with a chalice of Skittles vodka, singing along to Les Miserables.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
Just when I thought I was growing up, I go out and TOTALLY REDEEM MYSELF
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
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