I skipped work to stalk him.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Its not like i paid for sex. She was stuck there, we simply exchanged rides.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
We could all 3 jump out of a cake in just tophats. A true marble cake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Who knew you could get a drunk in public when jogging with your dog?
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
Well, if I'm gonna go gay, it's gonna be for NPH
Randomize