Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
Grab the Coors Light. Its time to get NASCAR drunk
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
Turns out vomit takes off spray tan.
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
I feel like my lungs want to punch me in the vagina.
is that even a sentence?
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
What are you feeling right now?
Idk. I just flashed a porch 🤷🏼♀️
So not in the best place to do an emotional inventory
Randomize
