Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Too bad my picture didn't come thru. It was one of me naked riding a unicorn with a wizard hat and a magic staff. And the unicorn had wings. And me too.
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
I think my goal for this black wed is to not scream at an off duty state cop in a bar after trying to flirt with him. No need to make that an annual tradition
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
In the name of friendship, I’m going to kick your children into the ocean.