You work out of a Hotel?
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Tbell employee was shuffling through my bag, calling off each item i ordered to make sure it was all there. I stopped him halfway through with "guy, don't worry, I'm high as shit, I'll eat anything."
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
To drunk to make oatmeal. I'm pouring it into my mouth and gargling it with beer. Ive made maple brown sugar bud light
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
The thing I'm gonna miss about him is his dick.
I'm listening to a women in metal station and wearing a flannel. I may have approached peak lesbian.
Randomize