I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
We had a complete conversation while I was giving him head, at one point he even stopped me and said 'I love how we're just hanging out.'
I love having a boyfriend. I just ate pancakes with regular syrup and chocolate syrup, I havent shaved my legs in a week, and Im still going to get laid tonight.
fuck. you.
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How does one fall all the way up a flight of stairs? Its hard on me knowing that the survival of our species depends on me not reproducing.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
I feel like god wrote up a contract of my life, and i just signed off on that shit without reading the fine print.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
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You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
He had the same tone in his voice and look in his eyes that he gets when he says UFOs aren't real.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
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