i was gonna tell him a really embarassing story about you, but then i remembered im in all of them
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
sex on the roof is not as easy as it sounds
The bridesmaid just threw up on herself. This is going to be the best wedding ever
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
She clicked her fingers, said "here boy!", and pointed at her vagina.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Well, at least you look pretty when you're disgusted
In the event that Ian's ex wife asks you, tell her I'm sweet snd innocent. No reason.
I'm having to shit out rocks
Randomize
