He just turned on a sound machine. I need to get the fuck out of here.
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
he came on my stomach, took his sock off, wiped it up, put his sock back on along with his shoes and left.
When i say that im working late and also have a paper to write before 9am tomorrow all i want u to respond is saying that ur gunna come over and sexually distract me from my responsibilities. Not a fucking frowny face.
Sorry. Im on my way.
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
It's like I'm tryna ride my horse through dennis quaid’s vineyard
That's a sexy sentence
I'm reading 50 shades of grey and masturbating while he's doing insulation downstairs. Maybe I can get him to bring me a sandwich
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
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