I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Was there a Canadian at your party or did I dream that?
i vomited out of my nose in three different houses so far, i will be back for my boots tomorrow
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
New low: uploading my contacts into Facebook in an attempt to get the name of the girl I brought home last night.
Randomize
