The project manager just came into talk to me for the first time and I had justed googled best drum solo ever and couldn't X out of the screen.
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
He has until sunday, then my legs are officially closed to him
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
So apparently I twerked on my coworkers last night. One month at the new job n I guess this is how I'm getting to know people
Made him watch 4 hours of HGTV then told him I was too tired for sex.
Savage
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
