Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
dont you remember the bouncer yelling at you while you were trying to piss?
no. why was the bouncer in the bathroom?
he wasn't. neither were you.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
btw good call for not making out for a pitcher of vodka, this hangover is bad enough
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
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