so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
See it, we're so close, i smell your vagisil
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
How do you set tits on fire ? I swear her tits were on fire.
Standards? I'm sitting on his couch eating microwaved ramen wearing his wife's t-shirt. I don't remember what having standards even feels like.
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
His face matches his life choices. Both are train wrecks.
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
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