I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I'm a fake celebrity on twitter. I need a life.
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
I mean really it's like when you're super hungry and you can't decide what to eat, you just know you want food. This is that situation, but for my vagina
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I was grinding on him when mosquitoes starting biting us and ruined every damn thing. I just wanted to fuck on a slide under the stars. It's every girls dream.
who is that guy in your bed? he looks like jesus..way to keep it festive
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
8 minutes into the New Year and and I've already sent a nude...new year, new me?
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