so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
was it you or me who tried to make the, what appears to be, nacho cake in the oven?
I took her to the bar and boom. All of my past slump busters were there. Shes cool enough to know what that means and said she was afraid they'd eat her so we left.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Dude. I'm no longer allowed to use my sword when drinking. I just spent 20 min cleaning up popcorn. I stabbed Moe in the leg and chopped his door knob off
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
WHO TURNS DOWNA FRESHLY WAXED VAGINA IN A MAIDS COSTUME LITERALLY LAYING IN YOUR BED
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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