ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
I dove into a random van at the bar as the door was closing and ended up at some house with people I've never met in my life dancing in a basement
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
He told me that I should keep my socks on next time because he read somewhere that it'll help me orgasm...
Randomize
