Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

ADVERTISEMENT

(817): View more from Texas

Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.

Fav 17 789 2866
share tweet
(859): View more from Kentucky

this just has baby written all over it

Fav 6 869 4472
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(512): View more from Texas

what did gay clubs do before lady gaga

Fav 34 6035 1200
share tweet
(303): View more from Colorado

you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.

(303): View more from Colorado

and I must say, you were very persuasive

Fav 74 19015 1422
share tweet
Here’s Everything Coming To Netflix This July
Read it at the TFLN blog
(613): View more from Ontario

Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.

Fav 9 2795 1369
share tweet
(229): View more from Georgia

I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.

Fav 17 3058 1150
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.

Fav 23 1263 3496
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(996): View more from

The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant

(996): View more from

This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.

Fav 0 192 117
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT

(706): View more from Georgia

I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again

Fav 0 30 1
share tweet

ADVERTISEMENT