so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
So the weirdest part of it all was he whispered in my ear "can i eat you out on your tredmill?" I dont find him attractive at all anymore
Her brother walked in on her giving me a bj and just laughed. I got a highfive before I left.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bartender just told me that there was numerous people who saw me having sex on the rooftop last weekend. +1
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya. My thumbs are those buffalo's, but my legs are spirits and my torso is that Indian guys and my head is the eagle
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
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