haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
I'm proud of you, you were pretty classy last night, you didn't puke AND you didn't take off your shirt, except for those two times in the corner.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
Excuse me while I take my birth control pill for today to prevent getting pregnant from hearing about your sex life
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
National tequila day this year falls on a Monday. I've never been more disappointed in my life.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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