Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Well, he has like 3 girlfriends but I think I could be polygamist for that dick.
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I went back to the party but by then they were all sitting on the floor in the dark listening to we are the champions on full blast.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
So apparently they remodeled our middle school. Looks like we'll need to find a new roof to play beer pong on this summer.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like "hey I give your roommate blowjobs twice a week, want to connect on LinkedIn?"
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
I don’t know whether to call out sick or call in drunk
She said my penis was powerful and magnificent
You came in yelling "I'm el scorcho" and then axe can flamethrowered my dresser. Awesomeness aside, you owe me a new dresser.
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