I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
It was like some kind of slut recycling operation. She gave me the shirt of the last guy she slept with in exchabge for mine so I didn't have to wear the same thing to work. She's been doing it for years
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
It wasnt until i started dancing that i realized i pissed myself dude. I dont think shes gonna call me back.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
What happened last night? All I know is that I walked into class this morning and everyone was chanting my name.
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