There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
I'm drinking beergaritas with a dog who is high and a baby
your completely serious
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
im actually so stoned and hungover i feel like a bag of jello stuffed into a human shape
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
There are days when you go to throw something in your bedroom trash can and realize the only things in there are a used condom, a Lime-arita can and a muffin wrapper.
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
No, I'm not a heathen. You two are the heathens, I'm the whore.
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