Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Tell him I'm the girl who was excited he spoke English. Then ask him where he picked me up from.
I woke up with a piece of pizza duct taped too my hand and a paragraph written on my chest. Good night is say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ideas I've had tonight: An entire movie based off the Pixar lamp jumping on stuff.
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
We need to catch up immediately. I took ecstasy and made out with carrot face this weekend.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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