everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
Hows this for an invention: a toilet that weighs your poop
he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Girls night always turns into let's seperate and get laid night.
Afraid I'm about to get arrested. Complicated situation but not a joke. If I do not text again that all is clear within 90 minutes kindly begin bail process. I have the cash to repay as soon as I get home. Details later.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
Almost threw up on my grandmother as she walked in the house. Had to run to the bathroom and vomit my brains out. Prolly getting taken out of the Will now.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
I'm only gonna ask u this once. Y is there a picture of u only in superman underwear rubbin ur nipple on facebook????
Uh I can actually explain that one..
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