Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
We're trying to see who can drink the most and still be eligible to donate blood tomorrow.
When I don't want to forget things I put them on my cigs.
C smoking isn't all bad
All I remember is intermittent flashes of being passed out on the side of the road 3 or 4 different times. And telling him to just leave me there and I would walk home in the morning.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
You can't just leave with hair like that
why does CNN give a flying $@*# about the royal baby so, so much?
i hope they name him Joffrey
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize
