you kept running across the street. everytime you made it across successfully you took something off. can't believe there were no cops around...
oh thats it?
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I woke up next to him fully clothed but my thong was around his neck. Polling to decide if we had sex or not starts now.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF NINTENDO FILLED GLORIOUS ENCHANTING FANTASY LAND ARE YOU IN?! DUDE DID YOU MOVE TO THE 90S?!?!?!
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
youll appreciate my drinking habit one day...
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