walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
I was afraid she wouldn't be able keep up but I woke up in a bathtub, she called me a pussy and made me pancakes.
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
I was walking back to the dorm and was made fun of for wearing a coat. I'M SORRY I CARE ABOUT MY WELL BEING.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
I'm driving to his house to eat chicken and hopefully have an orgasm
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
she crossed my comfort zone...i thought i was a freak
said the guy with a pink sex swing...
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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