We should be called the Road Head Warriors
Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
Just bought plan B with a coupon. Told the pharmacist I like to keep it classy.
Every day you talk to me ... I literally love you more..
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
my heart is telling me chinese, but my head is telling me beer.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Between the uncertainly of my bowels today, and the distance the bar is to my house, remember I am doing this for you and our mutual appreciation of alcoholism.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
Randomize
