Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thanks for stopping me from doing a one man keg stand by myself clad in only a towel. that probably wouldve ended badly.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
They just caught the deck on fire and I ran out with cups off the beer pong table filled with water from the toilet. It was the closest water source.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
if having to see my ex’s dick once in a while is the price I pay to the universe for making my life go a little smoother, I’ll take it
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