he called me "his little blueberry cunt muffin"...how would that make you feel?
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
When one of my seniors asked "Rough night?" I realized my poor decisions involving Tuesday night drinking did not go unnoticed.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
I traded some nice guy at the bar ten bucks and a pack of cigarettes for his leather jacket. I'm pretty sure I win at life. Whoever is in my phone as Tyler Durden, I thank you.
His hair is as curly as mine. It was like watching me go down on myself.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize
