yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Had sex with the Irish bartender in Spain. So that happened.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
I can empathize with sociopaths, serial killers, demons, gods, and monsters....straight white males are literally the only barrier to my 100% empathy rate. I don't get it.
If he comes over I probably get to fuck him and if he doesn't I don't have to pay him the $60 I owe him for weed. It's a win-win situation.
Randomize
