her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Quick!! What's a good reason for me to have rug burn on my chin?
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Is drinking before noon still a bad idea if you invent an amazing cocktail?
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
Randomize
